The Man I Married

Benji is a good man. Let me show you some examples:

Whenever we need to ride the boda boda's anywhere, Benji flags down two boda guys and then quickly assesses which one seems more gentle. Then he looks him sternly in the eye and says, "You will drive slowly and carefully with my wife."

Once, we were walking up a steep, busy African street. There was a man who had loaded many long wooden slats onto his bicycle and was pushing it slowly up the hill. It was an obviously heavy and cumbersome load, and the slats extended far in front and behind of the bike's length. The man was taking slow, laborious steps up the steep hill. Benji walked up behind him and said, "Let's go" and began pushing. They made it up the hill in record time, with many Africans turning to stare and laugh at the site of a white Muzungu man helping an African with hard labor.

He always greats the African men as "Sir" or "boss" which shows humility and respect. He often greats the older women as "mama." He has made huge efforts to learn their language so that he can greet them and thank them in Luganda.

When we were in Barlonyo, the women told us they do most of the labor. They wake up early, tie their babies to their backs, do the gardening, chop the wood, and cook the food. Several of the women were preparing lunch and one began to chop wood. Benji went over and said "Chrissy, let me try." All the people in the school house crowded around the windows to see not only a man, but a white man, doing the women's work of chopping wood in the heat of the day. When he was finished and we were walking away, we saw an African man pick up the ax and began chopping. One of the women said, "he is doing that because he saw you doing it."

He is naturally and continuously positive, he lifts me up day in and day out when I feel discouraged and low, he never looks for an opportunity to put anyone down or tease them about something they can't change, and he has a natural ability to see the beauty around him.

 Yesterday I told him "sometimes I'm even jealous of myself."And it's true. Whomever gets to be Benji's wife is one blessed woman, and I'm continuously amazed that I get to be her.

making french toast over a coal fire